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Depression is a Bitch!


Ok so us parents go through so much in one day and when it comes to the end of the day we look around and sometimes just feel defeated. well, I do at least and more often than I feel I should. I shouldn’t be so exhausted at the end of the day that I don’t want to be with my husband. Exhausted is only one feeling that I feel when I get into bed at the end of the day, being overwhelmed is the next emotion that rears its ugly head. Is there ever a night you can just lay down and close your eyes and fall asleep? Is this something that I am alone on? I can’t seem to turn my brain off; I start thinking of everything I have to do for tomorrow and then that turns into thinking about everything I didn’t have time to finish or just didn’t want to finish today. Next up comes depression, now I never knew what depression really was until I was hurt at work and lost everything, but depression is a bitch. I start thinking that maybe I could have done more today if I wasn’t so sad all day or maybe I could have spent more time with the kids today if I didn’t feel so Blah. Do my kids still love me, do they know what I’m going through and if they do will they understand or are they just upset with me for not playing around with them like I used to not more than a year ago? By now it is 2:30am and all I want is to go to bed because if I can get some sleep maybe I won’t be so tired throughout the day. The last thing that goes through my mind before I finally am able to cry myself to sleep is the fact that I have gained 50lbs because of this depression. I went from running 4 miles on the beach a day to laying in my bed 4 times a day just to take a nap when the kids are out with their friends.

Kids are our lives and we will do any and everything to make sure they are happy and healthy, right? Well, what about us as parents? We need to be happy and healthy as well and even more so because if we are sick who is going to take care of our children? Parents, we need to put ourselves first every once in a while, to make sure we are at our best and running on all cylinders. Please take care of yourselves Body, Mind and Soul! We are worth it; our families need us at our best!

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